First Annual "Go Diaper-Free" Week!

From April 21st to the 27th is the first annual Go Diaper-Free week!

http://godiaperfree.com/go-diaper-free-week/

https://www.facebook.com/GoDiaperFree?fref=ts


Day One

I started last night, and through the night I let Clay sleep in an AIO (All In One) diaper without the insert (so pretty much just a pair of underwear) and some pants. I put a couple of thick blankets underneath him so that if he had an accident my bed wouldn't get soaked. He peed three times and pooped twice throughout the night, and he had one miss (a pee). Throughout the day I'm keeping him in a pair of shorts or baby undies.

I was pretty excited when I discovered this event was taking place, because I've been doing Elimination Communication with Clay since he was a couple weeks old, but I've still been using diapers (which is fine). I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to take that next step towards being diaper free, for a couple of reasons. One, it kinda forces me to be more aware of his signals, because there's more on the line (like getting drenched with pee), two, I noticed that the cloth diapers kinda spread his hips/knees outwards (they are kinda poofy) and when he doesn't wear a diaper he has more room to move his legs around, and three, I LOVE feeling his cute little bum under his clothes instead of a big poofy diaper, his body is just to cute :)

So I'll keep you updated on our experience going a week with no diapers (this includes going out places! :P). We'll be using baby shorts and pants, tiny undies and the covers for the AIOs. Wish me luck! :D

Day Two

So last night went really well! No accidents, and he peed like three times. It's nice because he usually saves all his poop until morning lol :P

So, today I went out to a new parents group in my community which I've been going to for  4 weeks now. This time, there were actually other new moms there! :D Once I got there and sat down for a few minutes, I predicted it would probably be time for a potty break. I brought the inside of our toddler potty with me (which Clay uses all the time at home), so I took it out of my diaper bag and got him ready to go. I was sitting with the two new mums (T and V), and another friend I made with a 10 month old (K) and I whipped the potty out and got Clay to pee. I swear one of the best things about EC is the reactions I get from people! :D Everyone was asking me questions about it, and we had some really good conversations! T was really considering getting into cloth diapering (still on the fence), and V and I were already using them. Talking to us both I think inspired her to take the plunge! :) (yay!) Also all the mums there are fellow breast feeders, and the two new mums are baby-wearers! Squee! Like-minded people with babies Clay's age, finally! :D

Clay peed a few times at the family center (he had a couple of leaks on me too lol). He got weighed by the public health nurse (he's 13 pounds 11 ounces). At 12:00 I took him to the bathroom to clean out his potty and he peed in the toilet. Then we took off, to catch the bus.

I met a woman at the bus stop named Tammy. She mentioned that she was heading to the food bank (the one close to my house that I've tried getting a hold of for 2 weeks :P), so I decided to go with her. Clay was great the whole bus ride and the whole way to the food  bank. After I got registered I took him to the bathroom and he pooped in the sink :P Then I waited for my number to be called, and put Clay back in his sleepy wrap. He pretty much fell back asleep lol. I got all my food... It was A LOT. And the there were no volunteer drivers there today. So Tammy helped me lug all my stuff back to my house :P (it's like a 10 minute walk). My diaper bag was full of Clay's stuff, some canned food and a big jug of water, and I carried two heavy bags plus Clay in the wrap. Tammy carried the other two bags I had for me and pulled her cart full of food. I took my bags from her when we got to my house, and when I tried to stand back up from squatting I kinda collapsed cos of all the weight hahahaha!! I got inside and Clay had a HUGE poop and a nice long pee in the potty. Then he nursed for a little while, then he had another huge poop and pee like 10 minutes later lol. He's sleeping now. Everything is going well, and it's so satisfying for me to be aware of his cues enough for him not to have an accident and get me soaked while we were out and quite busy. I can't take all the credit though, if he had decided to go while I was waiting in line for my food, or walking home with all that food, I would've been very wet! Which is why I'm thinking while I have him in the wrap I may put a diaper on him next time, just in case!

So this evening so far Clay has had like 5 or more accidents on me! :S
He kept fussing and squirming while nursing, to me he very obviously had to go pee, so I would offer him the potty to which he responded with angry screams and tears! Then like 10 minutes later he would pee all over me! This happened like 5 times :P He's much calmer now, thankfully... I'm thinking maybe he's going through some sort of developmental milestone, with increased misses. Great timing Clay ;P lol! 

Day Three

So Clay didn't go at all last night, until about 8:00am when he had an accident. I tried him on the potty a couple hours later and he had his "big go" of the morning. At one point he was doing the same thing that happened yesterday evening, where he refused the potty with gusto, but still complained and fussed. This time it was gas. A lot of gas! I just stopped nursing him since he kept popping on and off the breast anyway, and just laid my hand on his belly. He totally relaxed after a few minutes, and then let out a bunch of toots that were quite powerful lol :P
It seems like today was ALL misses! 

Day Four

Last night I decided to start using diapers on Clay again lol. For one main reason: It seems that going completely diaper free can cause a lot more laundry if you have any misses (baby's pants get soaked, along with the multiple layers of blankets (and my pants) he sits on, instead of just the diaper getting wet and sparing his clothes (most of the time lol)).

So, we've been using diapers ever since last night, and we've been accomplishing the same ratio of misses and catches lol. Well, it was an illuminating experiment. I will still do diaper free time with him on a regular basis, but not permanently, at least not until we get better at the communication part of EC lol! Even as it is, I rarely change poopy diapers, which is a great feat in and of itself! :)

Day Five

So far I've just been going over exactly what's happened in my day doing EC, but today I'll go into my overall experience practicing it on a daily basis.

Like I said yesterday, we still have many pee misses, but on average I would say we have about a 60% success rate overall. Honestly, that's good enough for me! I'm certainly not implying I wouldn't want a higher "success" rate, but I'm quite happy with what we've accomplishes thus far. The communication between us has grown significantly, and I more fully understand his body language. I find myself gaining more confidence in my knowledge of when he needs to toot, or poop or pee, just as I know when he needs to burp, feed, be warm or just be held. Sometimes it takes me a little while to fully interpret what he really wants (in that time frame is when most of the misses take place), and sometimes he gets so upset that even if I hold him over the potty when he obviously has to go, he won't relax enough to actually do his business (resulting in a miss 5 minutes later, once his diaper is back on!). Sometimes it seems like he just wants to go in his diaper, which is fine, and through some research I've learned that perhaps this sort of thing happens because he's going through some significant developmental changes.

EC has become second nature to me, and it's just as much a part of our daily routine as occasionally changing diapers, feeding and doing laundry. Starting out it was a bit of a hassle (but the sensation of confusion means the brain is building connections! So I stuck with it, and it started to make more and more sense (I am still confused much of the time (but I guess that's inherent of being a mom or dad anyway!))

So, I'm here now. I may get better at understanding his needs, then I might find I all of the sudden have no idea what's going on. I think that's normal, and I think I'll just go with it :)

Day Six 

Today Clay and I went to a Pagan Beltaine Festival that lasted all day, and it's impossible to know how many diapers he'll need for the day! Sometimes he only needs 2 or 3, but today he needed 7 or 8, and I only brought 5 cloth (luckily I brought a couple (lighter to carry) disposables, just in case). He peed in his diaper again and again and again lol, but I caught three poops in the bathroom :)

I was talking to a friend about a little girl she just saw at this festival today, and how she thought she recognized her from years ago at another weekend long gathering. She explained that this girl's mother trained her to be diaper free, and that she would make some sort of sound and she'd hold her over the ground, and she would go!! Amazing!

I smiled and exclaimed, "me too! Sure saves on diapers." :)
Later on I approached the little girl's mother and started up a conversation about it. She's the first person I've met that did EC with her child! We really clicked and her little girl is such a sweetheart :) She started EC at 4 months, and told me about how potty training was a breeze and happened much sooner than the average of 3 years (her daughter is 4 or 5 now). I'm happy to have finally met someone who knows what EC stands for!

Day Seven

Today I walked down to Eric's work at the end of his shift to walk with him home. It was GORGEOUS out! A whopping 13 degrees :) the warmest day yet this year. While I was waiting for him outside I took a fussy Clay out of the wrap and nursed him. I knew he had to go but didn't really wanna go to the bathroom with him, so I squatted him with his diaper still on and cued for him to go. He sure did! and no mess or strange looks in public lol!

Well I hope this little glimpse into my life doing EC has helped, in some small way (or some mind boggling life altering way! Hey, who knows...). I'm syked to have contributed to the growing community of knowledge on the web regarding this practice, and I hope that I inspired some, and at least raised awareness for others. Thanks for following everyone! And please stay tuned for more fascinating posts about poop, breast milk, and other enthralling topics! Aahh, motherhood. Am I right?  

Here is a video of Clay cuing to go pee, me responding, plus the end result ;) 

and don't worry, soon I will be replacing this video with one where the end result will be easier to see! :P For everyone who has been following, I invite you to please toss me some topic ideas of things you'd like me to cover in my future posts. This is for you! :) Cheers! 

The Great Cloth Diaper Change

So this was an event I attended that was held on the 20th of April, to break the world record for the most cloth diapers changed at 11:00am around the world. It was a fairly short event but it felt really god to be among that many fellow baby wearers and cloth diaperers! :) Here's the site for more info: http://greatclothdiaperchange.com/

And here are a few pics :)

On our way there (it was miserable out!)

Attending a baby sign language workshop

Getting ready...

Hold your diapers up!

All done :)

Tired after a long day (on the way home)

Mum you're hilarious! xD

My Hot Yoga Outing!

So I had an AWESOME time at hot yoga on the 19th. Surprisingly, I was able to do most of the practice, and it was Intense! I think I should have had more water though... :P

I had to leave in a hurry unfortunately... I was nursing Clay and the next thing I know, my bus is coming in 3 minutes!! So I quickly but him down on the couch as gracefully as I could manage in a hurry, said my good byes and I love yous and left. 

The bus ride was weird, to say the least. I couldn't keep my mind off Clay for the first little bit, but the further away I got from him it seemed the less my mind lingered on him. I kept forgetting that without Clay with me, people had no idea I was a mom... then I realized I really like the attention I get for that fact lol :P I found myself not so opposed to everyone in yoga class seeing my tiger stripes (stretch marks lol) because then they would know who I am. Kinda silly, I know that :P

There was a young couple on the bus, and from what I eavesdropped, they were expecting a baby. I heard talk of morning sickness and other things of the sort. It was interesting... they had no idea I had just gone through what she's going through now.

I got to yoga and met with my mom. We got changed, and I was very aware of people glancing at my post-preggo belly. I liked the recognition (again, yes I know, a bit egocentric :P). Periodically throughout class I found myself thinking of Clay... I found it challenging to quiet my mind at times... I kept thinking, I want to do this every week (which I'm hoping will happen soon)! 

I felt so light and loose afterwards... :) It was awesome. I got home, half expecting to immediately nurse Clay... but when I walked in the door all was quiet, and this is what I saw...

I'm so proud of my partner. And the words I heard from his mouth soon after I got home; (sweet music to my ears...) "You're job is hard..."

D-MER (dysphoric milk ejection reflex)

So I just discovered the name of this gross feeling I've been experiencing during breastfeeding, or rather during my let down. It's called Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex. When my milk lets down while I'm nursing or at other times during the day, I get this really nasty feeling... utter self disgust... all my thoughts feel tremendously low and negative all the sudden, and I just feel revolting. Apparently this is a fairly newly discovered syndrome, and people are still trying to figure out exactly what causes it and what helps... It's been shown that a sudden drop in dopamine has something to do with it, but they still don't know why it happens. It isn't PPD, although I thought it could be. I feel fantastic and very level headed all the time, except when my milk lets down... D-MER is very different than PPD, so my research has shown me. It usually disappears as suddenly as it comes on...

I've experienced an almost identical feeling to D-MER before I even got pregnant. When engaged in any sexual activity, unless I was feeling 100% confident and unashamed of my body, I would have to suppress that feeling of filth and shame in order to not shut down and stop in my tracks. It had nothing to do with the person, because it happened with everyone I've ever been with, including myself... I believe it may have originated from my past beliefs that it was a sin to be sexual, before marriage anyway. When I first discovered my sexuality, I kept telling myself it was shameful and wrong, and yet I kept exploring it. Eventually I ditched the belief that I was a sinner because of my human sexual urges, but apparently part of me still clings to it, as I Still feel that way many years later, from time to time.

Those of you who know what I'm talking about I'm sure, Really know what I'm talking about. It can pull you Right down into the pit of your stomach and smother you. It's a challenge sometimes to not let it overtake you. Breastfeeding isn't always warm fuzzy feelings and cozy bonding time, in fact, it's usually pretty normal and sometimes a little boring. I know it may sound to those of you who've never breastfed that I'm putting a downer on the whole experience, when I should instead be advocating the good things, so that people don't get scared away, or get the "wrong" idea. The truth is, breastfeeding can be a rather uncomfortable and even painful affair at times, but I'm 100% sure that if I gave it up now and switched to formula, I would deeply regret abandoning the miracle milk that my body so readily provides. I don't know what formula feeding is like, so I can't really say anything one way or another about the emotional or physical experience, but I can say that I would deeply miss putting my sweet baby to the breast for physical, psychological and spiritual nourishment. As every day and normal as it is to me now, I'm certain in a few years I'll look back on this time with warm feelings and longing, despite some yucky feelings along the way (which motherhood is full of btw, it's impossible to avoid! ;D).

I try to make sure that during a few feedings each day I really connect with my baby and acknowledge the beauty of breastfeeding, because it is precious. I try to look my bad feelings in the eye and stand my ground, to see them for what they are... thoughts. And I know I am not my thoughts, I just have them, and that's okay. I don't know where they come from, and maybe I never will. It may just be one of those things that I will have to embrace and push through, just like all of life's challenges. I'm sure that this too shall pass. It doesn't for one second make me reconsider my choice to breastfeed, but even if it did which it probably does for some people, that's OK. Talk about it, write about it, get some support, whatever that looks like for you.

I hope more research is published on this subject and how to prevent it, but for now I'll just stay calm and stay hydrated (for some reason whenever I experience D-MER I crave water, lots of it!). Reading books on the practice of Zen seems to help most of the time :) If you're experiencing this too I wish you the best of luck and I implore you to comment and share your story, plus any information you have about it. I believe it's more common than people think and it's a good thing to know you are not alone.

Some of the Cutest Pictures of Clay to Date

Only a day old :')

Hi mum...

First time in the sleepy wrap!

Smiling in his sleep! (only a few days old)

Wide eyes!

Sleeepy

Such a tiny head!!

Jealous?

Booby!

I love the shape of his mouth in this pic! xD

Bath time smiles with daddy :D

hehehe...

Oh... It snowed... Again :/

Bright eyes!

Hello, Mr. Moosey

Here's to Beautiful Baby Boys! <3 :)

Hoping to go to a Yoga Class Soon!

I love yoga... I did it off and on throughout my pregnancy, but kinda ditched it for the most part. After having Clay and going through a brief recovery period, I was/am still pretty much attached to him, but I'm learning how to store my milk, and experimenting with it a little (tonight I'm gonna see if he'll drink the milk that's been frozen as I've heard some babies are picky with frozen milk)... My mom is coming out soon, and she's planning on attending a hot yoga class. If all goes well I plan on going too! It's kind of a daunting prospect... Leaving Clay for like two hours!? Not being able to see or hear him... :S I worry that Eric may not be able to soothe him if he gets really upset, which is why we plan on experimenting with Only Eric taking care of him and me doing my own thing, at home so if things get desperate I can put him to the breast. I think it'll be fine honestly, but part of me gets anxious at the thought of leaving my baby!

Doing some hot yoga will be SO worth it! I really need some time to do a full yoga practice and really detoxify (I gotta be careful to drink enough water though! I already have some trouble with that, and hot yoga is like doing yoga in a sauna! (LOTS of sweating!)). I try to do some stretches every day, but it's not the same at all. I am so looking forward to this! ^^

I just went out of the house for less then 10 minutes to swing at the playground next to the house... it felt... Weird. lol! Quiet... By myself...? Hahaha :P Recently I have been letting Eric take care of Clay more. I'm getting better at asking for help I suppose (and perhaps I'm getting better at backing off and not hovering as much lol) :) It's a really nice feeling to see them bonding together <3 I love the big smiles our boy is getting so experienced with :D He loves his daddy, it's so easy to tell.

Well, I will let you know how the yoga outing goes (around the 18th of April)... I'm probably over thinking it ;P

Elimination Communication

So for the people who have been reading my posts thus far, I've brought up something called Elimination Communication a few times, and you're probably wondering what it is if you haven't already looked into it. So here is my little guide to Infant Potty Training (:O!).

Actually it's more like parent training, and I'll explain why. The idea behind EC is that the parent(s) learn to interpret their infants "elimination" (pee/poop) cues so that instead of the baby going to the bathroom in their diaper, the parent can hold them over a potty and "catch" their elimination. EC-ers believe that a baby's elimination needs are just another facet of baby care. To quote http://godiaperfree.com/: EC is "a gentle, non-coercive way to respond to a baby's natural pottying needs, from birth, which enables her to follow her instincts to not soil herself, her caretaker, or her sleep space."

Contrary to popular belief, babies are born with bladder and sphincter control, so they are ready to begin EC as early as day one. It may sound overwhelming and difficult, but in my experience it can take be more of a hassle to clean up poopy diapers (and (I wouldn't have believed it before experiencing it) I've actually gotten used to not changing poopy diapers! :0). Also, bare in mind that half the babies/parents around the world do EC (although in other countries this natural practice likely doesn't bare that fancy new age title :P), and these babies are usually potty trained by 12 months, as opposed to the average of 3 years in the west! Babies in our society are generally taught to go in their diapers and often times it's not an easy habit to break! (EC-ers recommend you start between birth and 6 months).

The way that many people suggest first going about learning your baby's cues is to have some time every day for your baby to be diaper free, and observe what happens before they pee or poop. We're all familiar with some of the poopy cues I'm sure (scrunchy red face, grunting, etc...), and your baby may have some even more specific cues like squirming, kicking, etc. The pee cues are often harder to interpret, so using this diaper free observation time can really help. I know Clay has to pee when he continuously kicks out his legs (rather aggressively I might add!) and if he's feeding he bobs on and off the breast. When you notice your baby is eliminating, this is the time to make a "cueing sound" that they can begin to associate with potty time (we use "Pssssssss", but you can use whatever word or sound you like, and stick to that sound). 

Eric "pooping" Clay (lol)

You can do this every once in a while to get a good understanding of the cues they use every time (they can change as your baby grows), and you can start to pay attention to when they usually eliminate (after feedings, when they wake up, etc...) and then you can move on to the potty. You can use anything for EC; the toilet, the sink, a potty, an ice cream tub, a tree, etc... Remember, we're not really potty training the baby, just responding to their cues. You can still use a diaper if you wish to avoid an accidental mess, or you could use a diaper cover over a onesie, or you could avoid coverage altogether, it's really up to you (there are actually clothes that are used specifically for EC, check it out: http://godiaperfree.com/gear/). When you notice your baby has to go, simply strip down their bottom layer and hold them over your receptacle (You can hold there legs in a squatting position, and make sure that you support their back and head with your own body). Make the cueing sound, and wait. 

This is the suggested way of going about learning EC, but we had a somewhat different approach, since the first little while was a hectic learning curve into becoming a new mom. I was on the fence about EC for a while... I planned on doing EC during my pregnancy, but after I had Clay I kept thinking, diapers seems WAY easier and much less time consuming... but part of me was committed to it, and although I let him go in his diaper, whenever I noticed he was peeing or pooping I would make our cueing sound: pssss... so he could get used it. (So, I kinda skipped the diaper free step at first). After Clay was a couple weeks old we started trying the potty part of EC. Those first few "catches" were SO satisfying, and then I realized it's really not that hard! The only thing it takes is being aware of yet another one of your baby's cues, which, as parents we get quite good at as it is anyway! Now that we've been doing EC for a little while I've gotten used to not changing poopy diapers!!! He still has pee accidents every once in a while, but there have been days where he only uses one diaper, even at night! EC saves on diapers/or diaper laundry, helps prevent bladder infections, saves on fussy time as babies try to hold it in, helps prevent diaper rash, helps babies potty train much quicker than average, encourages continuous communication between parent and baby, helps keep track of the amount and look of baby's pees and poops, saves on wipes (you can just us toilet paper for catches), doesn't require lots of supplies, it's less messy and most importantly, it impresses and amazes other people ;D lol

EC fits in perfectly with all other aspects of attachment parenting, like baby wearing and bed sharing/co-sleeping. By being so close to your baby it's much easier to be aware of their signals. It's not something you have to do all of the time, either. You can do it exclusively or once a week, it's totally you're call! We do night time EC too, but it's not for everyone. Do what works for you and your family and have fun with it!

I'm happy to have contributed to the growing online community of EC-ers and how to guides. I hope this helps you on your journey to and through EC, and if this is the first you've heard of it I hope my writing was comprehensive and helpful, maybe even a tad bit inspiring? (whoa, now lets not get ahead of ourselves! ;])

Enjoy!

Today Was 10 Degrees!

So April 8th it's actually warm enough to take Clay outside without being all snuggled up in his sleepy wrap :) I carry him over to the ball park/soccer field next to our place, set up a couple of sheets on the ground and lay down with him to breastfeed. He pretty much falls asleep, and I lay there with him for a while, perfectly content to just stare at the clouds passing by... Mmmm, the smell of sweet new grass, the warm fragrance of spring. I chow down on a turkey salad sandwich, being mindful not to shower Clay with crumbs :P Clay is on the edge of sleep. He is betrayed only by the periodic nom-nomming on my breast, not for milk, just for comfort. I watch him silently, all bundled up next to me. A receiving blanket I thought would be bigger lay draped over the two of us, just enough to cover my belly and his poofy legs. Suck-suck-suck-suck...suck-suck......suck...Hhrrrrrrmphggrrrmm! He begins to squirm, maybe because of gas. He might have to poop, but I don't want to do EC with him outside yet, it's still to chilly for his bare baby bum!

He settles down again but I know it won't last long. I breathe in deep, and savor my little boy as he is in this moment. I think of my friend's new baby, weighing 8 ounces more than Clay! I held him on Easter, the day after he was born and was so amazed at how tiny he was compared to my chunky 2 month old! How is it even possible for him to grow so quickly??

Two little girls come running up from behind me, and they yell, "what's your name!?"
"Zoe!" I shout back... If they come any closer they'll probably see Clay nursing on my exposed booby... I wonder about that prospect for a few moments, then I hear someone calling from a distance for them to come back. A couple seconds later I hear someone asking "who is that?" I lay my head back down on my arm... Some people think little kids shouldn't see women breastfeeding... Sometime between toddlerhood and the early teens I suppose, breasts become known as private parts, sexual parts... I felt that way until I began my breastfeeding journey... Now, ironically, these fantastic porn star jugs are anything but sexual to me xP lol I go days without even passively thinking about sex!

I finish feeding Clay by sticking my little finger in his mouth to break his persistent comfort sucking, and I wait a few minutes. I pick him up and he opens his eyes with a smile :) He likes it outside, I think. We have some belly time and it goes really well. He doesn't get as frustrated on his tummy like he used to. He's getting better at it now, he can move and he probably feels accomplished about it! He looks around with new eyes at the big grassy field surrounding him, and he hears the kids playing in the distance. After a while he starts fussing. I can tell it's time to leave. I pack up our belongings, pick him up and scoop up the blankets, then head home. I pass a group of tweenage (wannabe) gangsters on the way, and smile at them, thinking about the life ahead of Clay and how proud I am to be his mum, no matter what.